Anxiety Attacks

I know what used to cause me anxiety attacks before. I was able to identify it. But I’m over it now. I’m no longer affected. But then, something else is causing me anxiety attacks.

I have come to realize that whenever I am about to “open it” or even think of doing so, I go hyperventilating. It sucks. My mind used to be strong enough to withstand it, but when days have passed I’ve realized that I could no longer do so.

My body is reacting in a way, I believe, to “protect” myself. This just tells me that I’m not over it. It seems like it‘ll really take me some time to do so.

I can’t even dare myself to “open it.” I hate it. Have I become this weak?

Music:
Garbage – I Think I’m Paranoid

Dizzy

I feel dizzy, really dizzy, and I don’t know why. I hate it. It’s a stressing feeling. Dizziness sucks. And I have back pains, though it feels better now.

Nausea & Vomiting are Evil.

I really hate having nausea, especially vomiting. They’re so troublesome.

I just vomitted all my lunch and there were bits of my breakfast’s bittergourd. And I’m still having nausea. How aweful was that? I don’t know what really triggered this condition. Must be the trip from Makati to Antipolo, maybe the weather, or perhaps the Strada itself. It gave me a lot of nausea before. Or worse, the anger I am keeping inside lately. I remember being really upset before and ending doing the same thing.

One thing is for sure. I hate to vomit. And I hate having headache with nausea. -_-

Dyspnea at 0150

What’s with the dyspnea?

I hate it. I don’t know why I’m having this. And the thought that I might know why makes me hate it more.

I need to recover very soon. I have to do it fast.

Poor Wound Healing

Such thing is a big sucker. I hate it. Well, I just seem to notice that a cut on my left thumb isn’t doing pretty well. I still feel pain and there’s still a sign of freshness on it. Crap. I had this wound two days ago so it should be dried already by now. It’s not leaking blood but it’s not in a good condition.